Let’s start at 5am. Not because it’s the start of the day. There is no start to your day. There is no end. It’s just one long, never-ending, mind-melting continuum of time from the minute you come home from the hospital until…. dunno, I’ll let you know when I get there.
5am
You’ve been sleeping for 40 glorious minutes when you are woken by the bleating of your baby in the bassinet next to you. You swear you fed her about 15 seconds ago. You’re pretty sure your left eyeball is bleeding because when your eyes are open non-stop for three weeks, they start to crack and peel from exposure to the elements.
You stick your baby on your boob while you sit up in bed. It used to hurt like a bitch but your nipples are now completely numb because the incessant feeding has toughened them into a pair of nice leather coasters. Your nipples are now like the soles of Tarzan’s feet. You could climb a palm tree with those boobs.