Hi buddy old pal, it’s Thud here. I know you know who I am because apparently you’ve been watching me (bit suss to be honest, but I’m willing to look past it. Because presents).
First up, I want to apologise for my indifference last year. I’m sorry I acted like I didn’t know/care about you, but I was young and dumb. If it makes you feel any better, I didn’t know where my nose was either.
Don’t worry, I’ve matured now. I’ve figured it all out. Sort of.
I mean, from what I understand, you’re a pretty big deal. Mum and Dad talk about you non-stop like you’re the judge, jury and executioner rolled into one. It’s clear I’m supposed to love and fear you in equal measure.