I used to be an adult. An adult who had adult conversations about adult things using adult language.
Now I talk about poo. And penises. ALL DAY.
Phrases like, “don’t put your penis in that” come out of my mouth on the regular, I don’t even blink anymore. It feels normal.
And phrases like, “my poo has gone to sleep” come out of my toddler’s mouth. Because he’s a massive liar and we all know it.
“Mate, do you need to do a poo?”
“Are you sure? You look like you need to do a poo.”
“No, my poo has gone to sleep.”
“Are you sure it’s asleep? Maybe we should go and sit on the toilet and see if it wants to wake up.”
“No, my poo is watching TV.”
See? Almost exactly the same as discussing the budget deficit.
Before we graduated to poo and penises, we had to go through a few stages of speech development:
- First words